This post is an adapted version of Purpose and Perspective Podcast, Episode 09. You can listen to it right here.
You know those days when you try to see the glass half full, but it still looks half empty?
When deep down, you know a slight shift in focus can change your course, but you don’t always know the best way to put it into practice?
Well, me too.
A quick internet search on the power of positive thinking turns up nearly 400 million results at the time of this post. But when a bad case of the blues threatens to pull you down, is there a surefire plan of action to battle the darkness?
As Christians, we know there is.
In a word, His name is Jesus. But in practical application, even from a standpoint of faith, we often have to approach the hard days with thoughtful design rather than default or autopilot.
You know?
Over the years, I’ve learned intention goes a long way toward creating space for sunshine, and whether the low place of life is real or perceived, there are a few things that can help turn the tide when hope seems elusive or out of reach.
Does the pain or disappointment suddenly go away?
Not always.
Are all of our problems solved overnight?
Not that I’ve experienced.
But if you need a few simple tips to clear your head and re-calibrate, I hope you’ll stay with me. It’s by no means a secret formula or an exhaustive list, just a little something to lift your vision when life gets you down.
Acknowledge There Is More To The Story
Last year, I had the opportunity to meet Lisa Appelo, a local writer and speaker who shares her story online with fresh inspiration for everyday life, but specifically for people walking through grief.
One day, she was happily married to her high school sweetheart, and the next, she was a sudden widow and single Mom to seven.
I can’t relate to her story in the sense that I’ve walked the same path, but the heart of her message resonates with me, and one particular phrase she referenced not long ago really stuck.
This is not Plan B. This is Chapter Two.
I know that mindset didn’t happen overnight, yet the simplicity of those two short sentences packs a whole lot of hope into a very messy, uncertain, hard place of life.
As humans, we’re creatures of emotion and our feelings tell a story. Sometimes it’s a true story, but often it’s way off center, making it easy to lose sight of the bigger picture, and view life through a blurred lens or a narrow portal.
I’ll be the first to raise my hand and admit I’m guilty.
Often, the first instinct is to hone in on the darkness. The valley. The hurt or disappointment.
But what I sometimes fail to do is expand my vision, and transcend what seems important in the moment to recognize the things that bring me down for what they are.
Part of my reality. But not the only reality.
In reflection, Lisa’s words tell a story within a story, and they spark a new outlook that could otherwise be buried beneath the heavy weight of grief.
Like her, we too can take hold of grace and remember there is still much goodness to uncover in the lines, pages and chapters unfolding around us.
Try To Brighten Someone’s Day
This second point really hits home, because I’ve witnessed – and experienced – the marked change in attitude that comes with applying the principle.
I have a beautiful piece of wall art hanging in my bedroom that says,
“The Heart is Happiest When it Beats For Others.”
So true. Yet so easy to forget when wrapped in our own little corner of the world, you know?
I remember the day I found the sign while browsing a Kirkland’s home store. A piece of wall art wasn’t on my shopping list, but it pretty much stopped me in my tracks, grabbed my attention and wouldn’t let go. Maybe because I really needed the reminder in that moment, but whatever the case, I took it to the checkout counter and brought it home.
And I can’t tell you how many times putting these words into practice has lifted my spirits.
When we desire to make another person smile or try to brighten their day, something special happens.
Acts 20:35 tells us it’s more blessed to give than to receive, and in Proverbs 23:7, we learn that as we think, so we are. But being able to experience the transformation on a day when you don’t really feel like giving makes it even more of a reality.
After I put the Kirkland’s sign on my wall, a particular Saturday comes to mind when I couldn’t seem to shake a lingering fog, even though there wasn’t a cloud in the sky.
I knew I was probably being too introspective, so while running errands, I decided to do something new.
I pulled into Starbucks and bought a gift card – which for the record, I’ve actually done many times before. 🙂 What was different this time though, is that as I made my way toward Target, I decided to give it to a random stranger in the store.
Suddenly, the things that seemed so important moments earlier were gone, and a little bit of nervous excitement took their place.
I was focused outward instead of inward.
Who would it be? A young mother balancing her shopping list, a grocery cart, and an impatient toddler?
An elderly customer slowly teetering down an aisle full of Saturday shoppers? Or maybe a local, middle-aged person, lost in their own world of hurt and holding discouragement close at heart.
I didn’t know. I wasn’t sure what to expect, or how it would turn out.
But the process changed me as I took on a deeper awareness of the needs of others, and who might best benefit from a little added cheer to their day.
In the end, the gift card went to a frazzled dressing room attendant, and I was surprised at how natural the exchange was.
I watched her field the demands of patrons asking questions from behind dressing room doors, and I saw the huge – and I mean huge – pile of discarded clothes as she sorted through the mess. And I knew she was the one. It was only a small, $5 token, but I handed it to her, and said simply,
“This is for you. God Bless.”
Her face lit up. She accepted it gladly, and responded with pleasure.
“Thank you! I really needed this today.”
I don’t remember what else I did or bought that day, but this interaction is branded into my memory.
Because whether it’s a simple card in the mail, a timely text message, an unexpected note slipped into a lunchbox, or even paying it forward at a drive through line, the beauty of God’s design is that when we truly desire to make others happy, we will find our own happiness.
Focus on Something Bigger Than Yourself
If I could sum up all these words in only one sentence, it would be simply this.
Focus on Something Bigger Than Yourself.
I don’t always do it well. But I want to.
The action might be something as small and seemingly insignificant as planning a day trip with friends, or as big as traveling to the mission field. It might be as powerful as a specific prayer, or as ordinary as providing a meal to someone in need.
And a whole lot of things in between.
When trouble or confusion come knocking, you and I have the opportunity to pause and allow the lens of our thought life to slowly shift. We can remember that a hard day or a rough season doesn’t define the whole story, and a stray mark or an errant blot across the canvas doesn’t determine the finished portrait.
We might even find that an improved outlook often brings a new and improved attitude along with it.
To circle back, let me say it’s been my experience that a positive mindset doesn’t always happen automatically, but can it be cultivated?
I think the choice is ours to make.
What do you say we take it to heart?
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