I love a good adventure, and I had great plans to celebrate my 40th birthday in style. As the milestone approached, my excitement started to build over the possibility of a Caribbean cruise, or a private mountain retreat tucked into the snowy landscape of rural West Virginia.
But things don’t always work out according to plan.
You know?
I wanted a whirlwind weekend similar to my 30th Birthday when a small group of friends whisked me away to the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, North Carolina.
But a decade later, all of our lives are very different, and something like that wasn’t a feasible option this time around.
In some respects, maybe my concerns were silly or a bit unfounded, but after much thought, I finally decided to embrace a more low key celebration closer to home.
It was my own personal choice, yet deep down I still felt disappointed. At the root of it all, maybe the true feelings were that of believing life itself should be different in this milestone moment, and the celebration brought those thoughts to the surface.
Isn’t that how it goes sometimes?
As much as we might wish for the perfect scenario, what works for one season of life doesn’t always apply to another, and somewhere along the way we realize our plans aren’t going to unfold with the smooth precision of a linear line.
It’s not always easy to know where we fit in, or how to commemorate the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.
Maybe you can relate.
As the months passed though, and my 40th Birthday quietly arrived on my doorstep, here’s what made the difference in re-framing my perspective:
I started to dwell on all the things worth celebrating in my current reality.
Like the thoughtful generosity of family and friends.
The unexpected card that brought tears to my eyes when it showed up at just the right moment.
The way my sister, nieces, and nephews stayed in town for an additional week after Thanksgiving just to be with me on my special day.
The time we donned sweaters and jackets to walk the shore of a nearby beach on a cool, sunny afternoon.
The special Mother Daughter lunch and shopping downtown.
Dinner with extended family and opening gifts beside a roaring bonfire on a clear December night.
It wasn’t at all what I expected or planned, but it was still beautiful.
If you’d have asked me a year ago how I would spend this special milestone, my answer wouldn’t have been anything similar to what actually happened.
But sometimes less becomes more.
Sometimes simplicity outshines elaborate, and though I think we all know this for the most part, it’s good to remind ourselves every now and then that who we’re with means more than where we go or what we do.
As I traded snow capped mountains and the shores of an exotic island for being a hometown tourist, this is what stood out to me most.
Fancy is great. Adventure is fun. But meaningful is even better.
This is a perspective I want to cultivate more of as another year dawns.
May I encourage you to do the same?
Whatever lies ahead, may we value appreciation for what is over regret or disappointment for what might have been.
Let’s lift our vision, look for gifts worth celebrating, and remember the best things in life are often slow, simple and filled with love.
Together, they make for a very meaningful combination.
You can find the adapted audio version of this post here, Episode 16 of Purpose and Perspective Podcast, “Don’t Let Unmet Expectations Dim Your Vision”.
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